Replacement after goodbye

(Photo from sonystyle)

I lost my point and shoot digital camera without noticing it. It’s been months, since I have been last touched of it. It is always been my baby, and I admit I am so attached to my camera. It’s always in my bag, I can forget my purse but never my camera, wherever I go to, it is always a rule to transfer it if I want to use another bag, it is my best friend. It was my best friend.

For some, it is strange that I wasn’t disappointed losing it. I look for it everywhere and still thinking of the places where I left it but not finding it didn’t make me thwart. But I’m not apathetic; I just want a replacement, a new best friend, that is.

I don’t know why I have such an attitude towards something or towards somebody when I lost it, slip it from me or chose to leave it behind. I recall the day that I left my daughter’s father, yes I cried but the next day, I was a different person, or maybe it is the real me, the other was just shaped by my blind affection to that person. He was totally out of my mind, of course I do know his name and his the father of my child but that’s it. A young mother of a 7 month old baby, dropped out of school and dependent to my parents again (I don’t actually remember when I stop being dependent to them, I guess I never was), not working but wasn’t scared to face a new day without the was supposed head of my family.  “I am now the head of my family,” I said to myself.

The first time that I decided to split, I was four months pregnant, and I was disturbed. How on earth can I raise my baby alone, so I called him to ask for support? What a great suggestion that he gave me, he’s going to support the kid, if I will live with him again. Nice! I lived in hell after that phone call. Again.  A one tormenting another year again.

My being optimistic, in a way, maybe helped me to disregard that bad relationship and move on with my life and the baby.

Now, all I think is I wish the father of my daughter is a point and shoot camera So I can replace him easily, but unlike my lost digital camera, he wasn’t my best friend. If I replace him, the other will might be like him, so I better not have any.

I will just get Digital SLR next time, so I can have two best friends soon.

And how I can forget my Sunday mutterings?

  1. Goodbye ::  Hello
  2. Cage ::         for threio’s parrot..soon
  3. Buddy ::      friend
  4. Magic words ::  thank you!
  5. Library ::    books
  6. Fall in love :: sometimes
  7. Tense ::       present
  8. Work! ::       at home
  9. Empty ::     unfilled
  10. Heat wave ::  California

Please visit some mutterings here.

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categories Personal | manilenya June 21, 2008

21 Comments to “Replacement after goodbye”

  1. By milet, June 22, 2008 @ 12:53 am

    i am always looking forward to your mutterings because of your side kwento. hats off to you!

    mine is up! hope you can drop by. thanks.

  2. By manilenya, June 22, 2008 @ 12:58 am

    milet,

    I hope my kwento won’t bore you, thanks :) I’ll check yours in a bit.

  3. By Hootin' Anni, June 22, 2008 @ 5:20 am

    very clever thinking on #7!! I was thinking in terms of emotion and you brought out a whole other concept. Way to go.

    Mine’s shared, stop by if you can find time.

  4. By Hootin' Anni, June 22, 2008 @ 5:20 am

    very clever thinking on #7!! I was thinking in terms of emotion and you brought out a whole other concept. Way to go.

    Mine’s shared, stop by if you can find time.

  5. By Sandy M, June 22, 2008 @ 7:13 am

    Great mutterings. We matched on one. Enjoy your day!

    Sandy M’s last blog post..Unconscious Mutterings #282

  6. By Adie, June 22, 2008 @ 7:49 am

    Hehehe… Pareho tayo ng ugali, te. Ugaling lalaki yan. And very practical if you really think about it. We can control our emotions more than the average woman. (Feeling superior daw ako! lol) Di ba mas okay nga yung ganon? Ako I think of it as a strength.

    Mabagyo dito, te. Sana okay sina Aya and family mo :) Happy Sunday!

    Adie’s last blog post..Weekly Question 5

  7. By bloggista, June 22, 2008 @ 8:17 am

    Ano nangyari dun sa Canon D60 mo? ;-)

  8. By monaco, June 22, 2008 @ 10:50 am

    Though I’m attached to things while I still have them, once na nawala na wala na rin para sa kin. I don’t look back and cry over something I’ve lost. Pareho tayo prend.

  9. By manilenya, June 22, 2008 @ 3:31 pm

    Adie,

    ugaling lalaki ba yun? naks!

    Okey naman sina Aya, puro ambon lang daw pero sabi nga nya sa kin signal number 3 nga daw e.

  10. By manilenya, June 22, 2008 @ 3:38 pm

    monaco,

    prend, marami yata tayong pagkakapareho ha :

  11. By reyna elena, June 22, 2008 @ 5:31 pm

    sa mga muttering mo, tingnan mo! nag-goodbye na rin ako! hmpt! hehehe!

  12. By manilenya, June 22, 2008 @ 5:34 pm

    reynz,

    hehehehe kita ko nga pero sus naman magpapayaman ka naman kaya ka mag gogoodbye e :)

  13. By cherry, June 23, 2008 @ 7:45 am

    iba na naman layout mo girl! =)

    cherry’s last blog post..weekly to-do.

  14. By Ivy, June 23, 2008 @ 8:00 am

    Mag DSLR ka na kasi. Yan ba ang dahilan kung bakit bago na naman layout mo sis. Looking good…….

  15. By manilenya, June 23, 2008 @ 10:44 am

    Cherry,

    hindi ako mapakali e :)

    Ivy,

    Wala pang budget sis :)

  16. By zherwin, June 23, 2008 @ 10:22 pm

    hmm, sa katulad kong me emotional attachment sa lahat ng bagay na tinatawag kong sa akin (naks, parang ang sosyal no? eh basurero lang ang tawag dun hehe), hahanapin ko pa rin sya (yung camera ha, hindi yung the father).

    go dslr!!!! :D (sabay ganun eh hehe)

    zherwin’s last blog post..Bloggers’ party, anyone?

  17. By manilenya, June 23, 2008 @ 10:27 pm

    Zherwin,

    hinanap ko naman e di ko lang makita.
    penge ako pambili ng DSLR lol!

  18. By eli, June 25, 2008 @ 12:22 am

    aba may side story pa ang camera. baka kapag nakita ng sony to bigyan ka ng camera..kase advertise m sila. hehe

    eli’s last blog post..Fading Leaf

  19. By manilenya, June 25, 2008 @ 7:57 pm

    eli,
    hehehhe sony kasi yung nawala ko e waaaaaaaaaaahhh!

  20. By Jennie, June 26, 2008 @ 10:55 am

    Naku sis, mag-dslr kana! I heard nasa 21k nalang brand new ng D40 dito sa atin! http://www.kenrockwell.com/tech/recommended-cameras.htm check that out. Lupet no. Kainis nga mas mura pa sa pagkakabili ko nito A620. True blue photographer ka na pag yan na ang bagong BFF mo. :-)

    It’s great that you are as resilient as you are. Not everyone is as blessed as you. You’re better off where you are now than if you have chosen to stuck it out with the wrong man. God bless you sis ko! Mwah! ;-)

    Jennie’s last blog post..High Definition Radio

  21. By manilenya, June 26, 2008 @ 10:38 pm

    Jennie,

    sis, wala pang pambili e, balak ko D60 maganda daw yun e. check ko yang site na yan kasi tignan ko rin yung Canon EOS 450 daw :)

    hehehe sinabi mo sis, at least hangga’t maaga e nagising ako diba :) GOD BLess you too sis :)

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